How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Who hasn't heard or said it? But his post is not about the famous woodchuck. This is the story of Chuck Forest who inherited a forest and grew rich on wood. How he did it? Read on. It is the real American dream come true.
Chuck Forest was a lucky man; he inherited a forest from his uncle Farmer Forest. He looked at it and thought that he could earn money from it. He decided to fell trees and sell them to interested parties. But he wouldn't do the hard work himself. He went and hired people to hew, cut, clear, and log the wood to the nearest river to raft it to the market. The wages were minimal; it made Chuck rich; the workers are known as the working poor. Put together, his employees still paid more taxes than Chuck did.
Chuck went to the market and saw that he could earn more if the wood had been cut into planks and dried to use for building houses. He decided to build a sawmill and get the refined product to market. He set his workers to do the building as well, saving a lot of money by not getting in any builders. But because they were poor, they knew everything about keeping a roof over their heads without money and the sawmill soon started working. Chuck got richer and the workers still earned almost nothing.
Then the state got concerned that the wood trade was killing off all the forests. They decided to limit the amount of wood that could come out of any forest. To make this fair, the state decided to pay a one of payment to the forest owners. This payment was paid from taxpayers' money. The limitation meant that Chuck fired half his workforce. Chuck got richer and his employees got poorer and still paid more taxes taken all together.
The state also decided to start a program for reforestation. Anybody who started planting trees could apply for a grant to offset part of their cost. With the rest of his workforce, Chuck continued felling the trees to fill his quota and planted trees. He got the government grant for the planting. The grant was paid from taxpayers' money, mainly Chuck's employees. Chuck got richer, his employees got poorer and still paid collectively more taxes than Chuck.
And the international community got concerned as well and the UNO or one of its subsidiaries created a label for sustainable forestry. And that label was paid for by the UNO; the UNO is paid for by the taxpayers of the member states. And the label paid a certain amount to forest owners who adhered to the label's principle and they were allowed to put the label on their products. And with that label, Chuck could raise the prices. And Chuck got richer and his employees still paid more taxes than he did.
Meanwhile Shantytown, the home of Chuck's employees, was growing and had reached the sawmill. The sawmill was outdated and needed replacement. Chuck decided to build a new one somewhere else on his lands and build housing and a supermarket where the old one was. But the mill had used certain chemicals and the ground was now toxic and not permitted for housing or supermarket. Chuck applied to the government to get a grant to remove the toxic ground and make it habitable. He got the grant, which was paid out of taxpayers' money.
Chuck built the housing estate, renting it out to his employees, and the supermarket, renting it out as well. Chuck got richer, his employees poorer. And because his housing estate housed poor people, Chuck received a yearly government grant to cover the difference between the rents paid and the statistical rent calculated by the government. And the grant was paid out of taxpayers' money. And Chuck got richer and still his employees all put together paid more taxes than he did.
And then the wood trade collapsed and all the forest owners and their sawmills were on the edge of bankruptcy. And because Chuck was such an important employer of many people, his company was bailed out with taxpayers money. And Chuck could keep all his money and his employees could pay all the taxes.
And because the company was at this moment virtually worthless thanks to taxpayers' bailout, Chuck gave it as a gift to his son Chuck Jr.; and because the value of the shares was set at zero, they paid no gift tax. And when Chuck finally died a rich man, they paid no inheritance tax on the very profitable company.
Is this the full and true story? Not really. I left out the part where Chuck got a ten years tax exemption for settling his company where he did; not that he could have packed up the forest and gone somewhere else. I didn't talk about the farm for which Chuck got yearly payments from the government not to plant anything. I didn't say that the supermarket company belonged to his wife who hired most of her employees on zero hours contracts to make sure not to pay one minute more than she had to. Just remember, woodchucks and Chucks are everywhere.
Further reading
How Money Came to Dominate Our Lives
Prophet of the Banking Crisis
Government Fraud and Cover Up
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